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Troilus and Cressida

ACT III SCENE I Troy. Priam's palace. 
[Enter a Servant and PANDARUS]
PANDARUSFriend, you! pray you, a word: do not you follow
the young Lord Paris?
ServantAy, sir, when he goes before me.
PANDARUSYou depend upon him, I mean?
ServantSir, I do depend upon the lord.5
PANDARUSYou depend upon a noble gentleman; I must needs
praise him.
ServantThe lord be praised!
PANDARUSYou know me, do you not?
ServantFaith, sir, superficially.10
PANDARUSFriend, know me better; I am the Lord Pandarus.
ServantI hope I shall know your honour better.
PANDARUSI do desire it.
ServantYou are in the state of grace.
PANDARUSGrace! not so, friend: honour and lordship are my titles.15
[Music within]
What music is this?
ServantI do but partly know, sir: it is music in parts.
PANDARUSKnow you the musicians?
ServantWholly, sir.
PANDARUSWho play they to?20
ServantTo the hearers, sir.
PANDARUSAt whose pleasure, friend
ServantAt mine, sir, and theirs that love music.
PANDARUSCommand, I mean, friend.
ServantWho shall I command, sir?25
PANDARUSFriend, we understand not one another: I am too
courtly and thou art too cunning. At whose request
do these men play?
ServantThat's to 't indeed, sir: marry, sir, at the request
of Paris my lord, who's there in person; with him,30
the mortal Venus, the heart-blood of beauty, love's
invisible soul,--
PANDARUSWho, my cousin Cressida?
ServantNo, sir, Helen: could you not find out that by her
PANDARUSIt should seem, fellow, that thou hast not seen the
Lady Cressida. I come to speak with Paris from the
Prince Troilus: I will make a complimental assault
upon him, for my business seethes.
ServantSodden business! there's a stewed phrase indeed!40
[Enter PARIS and HELEN, attended]
PANDARUSFair be to you, my lord, and to all this fair
company! fair desires, in all fair measure,
fairly guide them! especially to you, fair queen!
fair thoughts be your fair pillow!
HELENDear lord, you are full of fair words.45
PANDARUSYou speak your fair pleasure, sweet queen. Fair
prince, here is good broken music.
PARISYou have broke it, cousin: and, by my life, you
shall make it whole again; you shall piece it out
with a piece of your performance. Nell, he is full50
of harmony.
PANDARUSTruly, lady, no.
HELENO, sir,--
PANDARUSRude, in sooth; in good sooth, very rude.
PARISWell said, my lord! well, you say so in fits.55
PANDARUSI have business to my lord, dear queen. My lord,
will you vouchsafe me a word?
HELENNay, this shall not hedge us out: we'll hear you
sing, certainly.
PANDARUSWell, sweet queen. you are pleasant with me. But,60
marry, thus, my lord: my dear lord and most esteemed
friend, your brother Troilus,--
HELENMy Lord Pandarus; honey-sweet lord,--
PANDARUSGo to, sweet queen, to go:--commends himself most
affectionately to you,--65
HELENYou shall not bob us out of our melody: if you do,
our melancholy upon your head!
PANDARUSSweet queen, sweet queen! that's a sweet queen, i' faith.
HELENAnd to make a sweet lady sad is a sour offence.
PANDARUSNay, that shall not serve your turn; that shall not,70
in truth, la. Nay, I care not for such words; no,
no. And, my lord, he desires you, that if the king
call for him at supper, you will make his excuse.
HELENMy Lord Pandarus,--
PANDARUSWhat says my sweet queen, my very very sweet queen?75
PARISWhat exploit's in hand? where sups he to-night?
HELENNay, but, my lord,--
PANDARUSWhat says my sweet queen? My cousin will fall out
with you. You must not know where he sups.
PARISI'll lay my life, with my disposer Cressida.80
PANDARUSNo, no, no such matter; you are wide: come, your
disposer is sick.
PARISWell, I'll make excuse.
PANDARUSAy, good my lord. Why should you say Cressida? no,
your poor disposer's sick.85
PANDARUSYou spy! what do you spy? Come, give me an
instrument. Now, sweet queen.
HELENWhy, this is kindly done.
PANDARUSMy niece is horribly in love with a thing you have,90
sweet queen.
HELENShe shall have it, my lord, if it be not my lord Paris.
PANDARUSHe! no, she'll none of him; they two are twain.
HELENFalling in, after falling out, may make them three.
PANDARUSCome, come, I'll hear no more of this; I'll sing95
you a song now.
HELENAy, ay, prithee now. By my troth, sweet lord, thou
hast a fine forehead.
PANDARUSAy, you may, you may.
HELENLet thy song be love: this love will undo us all.100
O Cupid, Cupid, Cupid!
PANDARUSLove! ay, that it shall, i' faith.
PARISAy, good now, love, love, nothing but love.
PANDARUSIn good troth, it begins so.
Love, love, nothing but love, still more!105
For, O, love's bow
Shoots buck and doe:
The shaft confounds,
Not that it wounds,
But tickles still the sore.110
These lovers cry Oh! oh! they die!
Yet that which seems the wound to kill,
Doth turn oh! oh! to ha! ha! he!
So dying love lives still:
Oh! oh! a while, but ha! ha! ha!115
Oh! oh! groans out for ha! ha! ha!
HELENIn love, i' faith, to the very tip of the nose.
PARISHe eats nothing but doves, love, and that breeds hot
blood, and hot blood begets hot thoughts, and hot120
thoughts beget hot deeds, and hot deeds is love.
PANDARUSIs this the generation of love? hot blood, hot
thoughts, and hot deeds? Why, they are vipers:
is love a generation of vipers? Sweet lord, who's
a-field to-day?125
PARISHector, Deiphobus, Helenus, Antenor, and all the
gallantry of Troy: I would fain have armed to-day,
but my Nell would not have it so. How chance my
brother Troilus went not?
HELENHe hangs the lip at something: you know all, Lord Pandarus.130
PANDARUSNot I, honey-sweet queen. I long to hear how they
sped to-day. You'll remember your brother's excuse?
PARISTo a hair.
PANDARUSFarewell, sweet queen.
HELENCommend me to your niece.135
PANDARUSI will, sweet queen.
[A retreat sounded]
PARISThey're come from field: let us to Priam's hall,
To greet the warriors. Sweet Helen, I must woo you
To help unarm our Hector: his stubborn buckles,
With these your white enchanting fingers touch'd,140
Shall more obey than to the edge of steel
Or force of Greekish sinews; you shall do more
Than all the island kings,--disarm great Hector.
HELEN'Twill make us proud to be his servant, Paris;
Yea, what he shall receive of us in duty145
Gives us more palm in beauty than we have,
Yea, overshines ourself.
PARISSweet, above thought I love thee.

Troilus and Cressida, Act 3, Scene 2


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