| ACT V SCENE IV | Plains between Troy and the Grecian camp. | |
| [Alarums: excursions. Enter THERSITES] |
| THERSITES | Now they are clapper-clawing one another; I'll go |
| look on. That dissembling abominable varlets Diomed, |
| has got that same scurvy doting foolish young knave's |
| sleeve of Troy there in his helm: I would fain see |
| them meet; that that same young Trojan ass, that | 5 |
| loves the whore there, might send that Greekish |
| whore-masterly villain, with the sleeve, back to the |
| dissembling luxurious drab, of a sleeveless errand. |
| O' the t'other side, the policy of those crafty |
| swearing rascals, that stale old mouse-eaten dry | 10 |
| cheese, Nestor, and that same dog-fox, Ulysses, is |
| not proved worthy a blackberry: they set me up, in |
| policy, that mongrel cur, Ajax, against that dog of |
| as bad a kind, Achilles: and now is the cur Ajax |
| prouder than the cur Achilles, and will not arm | 15 |
| to-day; whereupon the Grecians begin to proclaim |
| barbarism, and policy grows into an ill opinion. |
| Soft! here comes sleeve, and t'other. |
| [Enter DIOMEDES, TROILUS following] |
| TROILUS | Fly not; for shouldst thou take the river Styx, |
| I would swim after. | 20 |
| DIOMEDES | Thou dost miscall retire: |
| I do not fly, but advantageous care |
| Withdrew me from the odds of multitude: |
| Have at thee! |
| THERSITES | Hold thy whore, Grecian!--now for thy whore, | 25 |
| Trojan!--now the sleeve, now the sleeve! |
| [Exeunt TROILUS and DIOMEDES, fighting] |
| [Enter HECTOR] |
| HECTOR | What art thou, Greek? art thou for Hector's match? |
| Art thou of blood and honour? |
| THERSITES | No, no, I am a rascal; a scurvy railing knave: |
| a very filthy rogue. | 30 |
| HECTOR | I do believe thee: live. |
| [Exit] |
| THERSITES | God-a-mercy, that thou wilt believe me; but a |
| plague break thy neck for frightening me! What's |
| become of the wenching rogues? I think they have |
| swallowed one another: I would laugh at that | 35 |
| miracle: yet, in a sort, lechery eats itself. |
| I'll seek them. |
| [Exit] |
Shakespeare's Troilus and Cressida: Scenes and Commentary